Please Don’t Feed the Solicitors: Stupid Solicitation of the Day

Some email solicitations can actually be worthwhile, but it seems that more often than not, their value is highly lacking. I like to label some as SS, for stupid solicitation of the day. Here is the SS that arrived via contact form spam for me the other day on one of my large beauty product sites. I removed names and put them in parenthesis:

“(My Website) Team,
I thought you might like to know some of the reasons why you are not getting enough Social Media and Organic search engine traffic for (My Website)

1. Social profile is not available in top Social Media websites.
2. Your site has 0 Google back links, this can be improved further.
There are many additional improvements that could be made to your website, and if you would like to learn about them, and are curious to know what our working together would involve, then I would be glad to provide you with a detailed analysis in the form of a WEBSITE AUDIT REPORT for FREE.
To brief you about our company, we are one of the fastest-growing Internet marketing Company of the world. We give 100% unconditional money back guarantee.
Our clients consistently tell us that their customers find them because they are at the top of the Google search rankings. Being at the top left of Google (#1- #3 organic positions) is the best thing you can do for your company’s website traffic and online reputation.
Sounds interesting? Feel free to email us or alternatively you can provide me with your phone number and the best time to call you.
Best Regards,
(Individual’s Name)

(phone Number)
SEO Consultant
PS1: This is onetime email and you may ask us to “REMOVE” you from our mailing list.
PS2: I found your site from online advertising but did not click.
PS3: We operate 24 x7. I will be happy to send you links to price list, 100% money back guarantee, client rankings, client testimonials, “How we are different from others?”, and “Why should you choose us?” on receiving a response from you.”

Now, let us count the lies:

(1) I actually am getting good social media and organic traffic. Is it enough? I guess people always want more, but it is enough not to hire anyone to do SEO for me, especially when I suspect that I just might know as much, if not more, about SEO than a contact form spammer.

(2) My site has a large number of Google backlinks. If you are going spam for customers, at least do your homework first. I suspect that 0 is in every one of these solicitations that they send. Or they are using one of the services or browser plugins that often go down and display 0 for that field.

(3) Since I got the letter via contact form spam, I suspect that sending an email with “remove” will simply add me to a list. Too bad that I can’t remove people from my contact form (although I suppose I could block the IP).

(4) My site could not have been found via online advertising, as I am not running any online ads at the moment. Plus, that is just plain an odd thing to include.

This all leads me to what appears to be the largest lie of them all: I have doubts that this company is one of the fastest growing in the world as it claims, or has the number of happy customers that they would lead you to believe. Not when they spam contact forms, fail to leave the actual name of the company, and send such a poorly constructed solicitation.

Please don’t fall for junk like this. If you need SEO help there are plenty of very good legitimate sources out there, and they won’t be the ones spamming your contact form seeking business.

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